Somewhere on Westheimer, a mostly empty but way cinematic strip mall. I’d love to shoot something here.
(Alice Tully Hall, Broadway & 65 St, Manhattan)
I was biking home through Central Park one night when I saw a light up ahead on the Park Loop. I figured it was a low-flying NYPD helicopter and paid it no mind. It was hovering directly in front of my path, illuminating the ground with a strong spotlight. I wanted to avoid the light but there was no way to do it without going off the road and into the grass. Plus, something drew me to the light. Something I couldn’t explain. I rode right into the spotlight and stopped. I looked up but could see nothing but blinding light. The earth shook and the trees swayed like in a hurricane. My bike and my heart rattled so loudly I thought I would shatter into a thousand pieces.
Then, suddenly, the light was gone.The next few weeks were a strange time. Jo couldn’t understand why I had sunburn on only half of my face. I would catch my cat whispering whenever I turned my back. I made strange sculptures with my mashed potatoes. I kept trying to change my iPhone ringtone to some song I’d never heard before but couldn’t stop humming.One night, while working late at the office, I decided I had to get out. I thought I’d pick Jo up at school, since her class was just about to get out. When I got out of the 66 Street Subway Station, I saw the lights. The mothership was landing. And I finally recognized the song I coudn’t get out of my head. The musical juggernaut had come to take me.
(Juilliard School, 65 St & Broadway, Manhattan)
Stop right where you are! You know the score, pal. You’re not cop, you’re little people. – Captain Bryant
(43 St & Broadway, Manhattan)
(Convent Av & 144 St, Manhattan)
A theatre created by folks that love movies and food? Alamo Drafthouse, where have you been all my life? You make me want to cheat big time on my beloved Gotham.
(Alamo Drafthouse Cinema, South Lamar, Austin, TX)
Between parties and panels and sold-out screenings, it’s impossible to see everything I want to see at Slamdance/Sundance. Fortunately, I got a chance to catch Goliath, which is a pretty terrific movie. Especially if you’re a cat lover. Here kitty kitty kitty kitty…
(Zellner Brothers at the Library Center Theater, Park City, UT)
You’d be wrong, though. Who can forget these classic lines?
Lunar Bureaucrat #1: Well, anybody hungry?
Dr. Floyd: What we got?
Lunar Bureaucrat #1: You name it.
Floyd: What’s that, chicken?
Lunar Bureaucrat #1: Something like that. Tastes the same, anyway. [laughter]
Lunar Bureaucrat #2: Any ham? [searches through cooler]
Lunar Bureaucrat #1: Ham…ham…ham…ham…there. [hands him the sandwich]
Lunar Bureaucrat #2: Good.
Floyd: Ah, they look pretty good.
Lunar Bureaucrat #1: They’re getting better at it all the time.
Post script: It took all the willpower I had (not to mention the fear of severe embarrassment at airport security) to keep me from taking home an M2019 blaster while visiting this store. Another customer bought two while I was there.
(Monsters in Motion, Placentia, CA)
The cool and detached side of me wants to ask whether watching something that’s 2.35 letterboxed on a 2.5 inch screen is compelling, but it’s being drowned out by the Oh Shit, It’s Fight Club! side of me at this particular moment.